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Mary goes up to Father O’Leary after his Sunday mass, and she's in tears.
Father O’Leary says, ‘So what's bothering you, Mary?’
She says, ‘Oh, Father, I've got terrible news. Paddy, me husband, passed away last night.’
Father O’Leary says, ‘Oh, Mary, that's terrible. Tell me, Mary, did Paddy have any last requests?’
She says, ‘Aye, that he did, Father...’
The priest says, ‘What did he ask, Mary?’
She says, ‘He said, 'Please, Mary, put down that damn gun...’ '
Happy St Patrick’s Day.