A CEO now stands for the Chief Embezzlement Officer and the CFO is the Corporate Fraud Officer. A Bull Market is a random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius while a Bear Market is the 6-to-18-month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.
The old idea of 'Value Investing' has been redefined as the art of buying low and selling lower and the constantly monitored P/E Ratio is the percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing. Broker is what my broker has made me and Standard & Poor is my life in a nutshell.
A Financial Planner is the guy whose phone has been disconnected and a Market Correction is what happens the day after you buy a stock. And Institutional Investors are those who are now locked up in a nuthouse.
As for profit, that's an archaic word no longer in use except by Muslims.
Happy "Investing'!
