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Today's quote:

Sunday, February 14, 2010

The week that was!

A 12-year-old girl has dropped divorce proceedings against an 80-year-old man her father forced her to marry in exchange for a dowry. Media in Saudi Arabia report the girl's father arranged the marriage last September for a dowry worth $25,000. The girl has now withdrawn proceedings and told the court she agrees to the marriage out of respect to her father.

The internet will potentially lose one of its main sources of bestiality videos under a ban approved by the upper house of the Dutch Parliament. The new law bans human sex with animals which had been legal in the Netherlands, as long as it could be proven the animals were not injured.

An Arab ambassador in Dubai annulled his wedding after discovering that his bride, who wore the niqab, had a beard and squinted. The marriage had been arranged through pictures given by the bride’s family that were later proven to be those of the sister of the bride-to-be. During the brief meetings with his fiancé the ambassador was unable to see her face as she was fully veiled. Once the marriage contract had been signed, he tried to kiss his wife and discovered “she had a beard and squinted.”

Kyrgyzstan is preparing to roll out a new system under which the millions of sheep residing in the mountainous state will receive their own high-tech passport, state television reported. First Deputy Prime Minister Akylbek Japarov says the government has drafted a bill to deliver cutting-edge passports to the nation's sheep. "We are ready to make a passport for each sheep," he said in an address to Parliament.

Jim Bradlley, Ontario’s transportation minister, said he was proud of having helped to introduce the 'distracted driving laws'. He said he wanted to make these law much more encompassing in the near future. He was quoted as saying; “Sure talking on a cell phone while driving is dangerous but there are many other activities occuring during driving that are just as dangerous if not more-so.” “For example the other day I was almost side-swiped by a man that was completely distracted while picking his nose, and I don’t mean just a nose scratch - he was in up to his knuckle”.

The Shady Lady Ranch in Nevada successfully won state and county approval to clear the way for the "prostidude," the state's first male prostitute.

Taxi drivers in Southampton who put up stickers in their cabs saying they speak English have been accused of racism and warned they face suspension.

Akbar Zeb must be one of Pakistan's most valuable diplomatic aces because they keep floating his name as potential ambassador to United Arab Emirates, and Bahrain, and now Saudi Arabia. All three countries have rejected him, though, because in their Arabic dictionaries, "akbar zeb" means "biggest dick."

Ogling over women's breasts is good for a man's health and can add years to his life, medical experts have discovered. According to the New England Journal of Medicine, "Just 10 minutes of staring at the charms of a well-endowed female is roughly equivalent to a 30-minute aerobics work-out" declared gerontologist Dr. Karen Weatherby.

Don't we live in a wonderful world? What is man, when you come to think about it, but a minutely set, ingenious machine for turning, with infinite artfulness, the red wine of Shiraz into urine?