To watch that Fight Club display in the Oval Office, in which a confirmed villain and draft-dodger (remember his alleged case of bone spurs?) and a guy who was a press secretary in the Marines doubled up on a guy who is fighting an actual war right now, while reporters razz him about his outfit, was numbing despite Trump's remark that "This is going to be great television".
Every time I see Trump I can't help myself but be reminded of the blue whale. The blue whale's anus can stretch to approximately 3.5 feet in diameter which makes it only the second-biggest asshole in the world.
Both Putin and Xi Jinping must be having laughing fits when Trump doubled down by pausing all military aid to Ukraine, and then started a trade war by imposing tariffs on his most loyal allies as well as China. Last time I looked, tariffs aren't paid by the foreign countries they target; instead, they're charged to the buyer of those goods and the money goes to — in this case — the US treasury. Trump is imposing a new tax on his own citizens who seem to be too stupid to understand this - not until next week when they go shopping and find prices up by 20%.
As for making peace with the ex-KGB-man Putin, does Trump even know the name Chamberlain, let alone what happened on 30 September 1938 when said Chamberlain returned to London and said that Hitler had told him that he had 'No more territorial demands to make in Europe'? "Peace for our time", Chamberlain declared triumphantly. Putin has conquered half of America faster than he conquered just one-fifth of Ukraine.
Meanwhile, the American vice president JD Vance ushered in a new era of European solidarity after he had addressed the Munich Security Conference. "I came to Munich full of skepticism that we as a group of nations could find common ground on anything", Danish delegate Hartvig Dorkelson said. "That all changed the moment that prick Vance opened his mouth." Europe is now united in the belief that JD Vance is a prick, but Dorkelson warned against taking this historic consensus for granted. "I worry that our unity could be short-lived", he said. "So we must invite that fucker to speak again next year."
On the domestic front, the queers have found a new hero in the bushranger Captain Moonlite who has been turned into a queer posthumously. And "Auntie", our "only eight cents a day" ABC, has already spent $1.1 million in legal costs defending the case brought by Antoinette Lattouf after she was taken off air part-way through a FIVE-DAY casual stint as a presenter for ABC Radio Sydney in December 2023, after sharing a post about the war in Gaza with the caption "HRW reporting starvation as a tool of war". Couldn't they just have asked her to serve out her last TWO DAYS as tea lady instead of dismissing her?
And there you have it: a man without a suit getting a dressing-down from a suit without a man; yet another queer in Australia; and "Auntie" wasting our 8 cents a day. And cyclone Alfred bearing down on South East Queensland and the Northern Rivers. I had always thought cyclones were given female names because they are unpredictable (and also take your house and car). This cyclone must be transgender.
(Mind you, a female cyclone would be done and dusted by now. This bloke has stopped at the pub, gone fishing, told his family he'll do it tomorrow, and probably needed to go to the loo at the last minute.)
P.S. If you live in the path of cyclone Alfred, don't forget to rush out and buy 50 rolls of Dunny paper, 50 litres of milk, 25 loaves of bread, 5 dozen eggs, 10 bags of frozen vegetables, and last but not least, 25 cartons of beer - after all, it'll be two days, so it's better to be safe.
